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Sie sind hier: Home » Girl Friday – the Book of Bad » Girl Friday – the Book of Bad 05. Imagine The Kiss
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Gabbi WernerGirl Friday – the Book of Bad 05. Imagine The Kiss

Von | 26.04.2013, 9:00 | Kein Kommentar

When Love keeps you waiting and you want to kiss. Right now, in Barcelona.

Welcome. To the stories I told in many hotelrooms. To a man who had trouble falling asleep. A business deal, men usually pay for different services in hotelrooms. He just paid for my words. Here they are.

*

I was to have my first ever affair, even if it was with my own love, yet I was not sure how to handle it. I had felt excited. But now, as my boyfriend was a no-show, I felt stupid. I could have gone to Barcelona on my own just as well.

I promised myself to make the best of the situation no matter what and walked to the coffee-bar where my boyfriend and I had intended to meet. Sat there, had a coffee, tried to enjoy the sun. It was half past one, he was supposed to arrive in about twenty minutes. Now, he was at that course of his, learning how to turn tomatoes inside-out and whatnot jelly stuff.

I realised that if we had not prepared all so well, I would have never met him in real life. Fate would not direct him to my hotel, it was our groundwork that would make it possible. There would be no subconscious drive leading him towards me late in the afternoon and making him knock on my door and finally kiss me.

And even if his will would be broken by the powers that be, and he would find himself at my hotel-room, how would i respond? If an unknown guy would knock on my door and I would be there to open it and he would kiss me, I would punch him hard, close the door and have the police called. We would not get to share everything. I would be without him forever, having no memory of our past, no vision of our future. So much for fate.

The thought scared me.

*

People were passing on the plaza. I was hot. I ordered an orange juice and drank it too quickly. My stomach got upset. I was dizzy. I got scared my boyfriend would somehow not make it. This date, this fake date of ours, not happening, would be the end of us. He could get in a car crash, or maybe he had met a really beautiful female cook and had fallen in love with her that morning.

I so longed for him.

I had no reason to sit here and wait for him, knowing he would not show up. All was lost. We were lost.

There was a couple sitting next to me. They were kissing, holding hands, feeding one another the froth of their coffee. I was alone. Not with my love. Why had we ever agreed to do this? Why had I kept my promise? Why had he not? It surely meant I was not so important to him anymore. I was just part of his fun, whilst he was all the fun to be had for me in this overheated city.

The orange juice started to go wrong in my body. My stomach was ice cold, my skin was burning. I had to get back home. Even if the hotel was supposed to be home right now.

I got up and paid and started walking to the hotel as quickly as I could. I tried to walk in the shadows, the sun was too bright for me, it stung me, it made my thoughts jumbled. Avoiding the sun and overcrowded streets, since the noise of the traffic and the people speaking their swift and harsh Spanish only made me more uncomfortable, I got lost. Every street and all the plazas looked the same. Black walls, gothic turrets, a small go-through, then another plaza. Or another crowded street. All the shops, the restaurants, looked the same. I had to get back to the hotel. I walked until I got to a big street and halted a cab and told him where to go: „The Majestic Hotel please.“

The cabdriver said no. I asked him, in my broken Spanish, why not. He replied, in just as broken German, as if it made no difference what language he spoke to me in, that it was not far enough to take me, I could go by foot. I offered him twenty Euros. He sighed, started the car, drove for about half a minute and held up his hand.

I was ashamed. I had been walking in the right direction all along. I paid up the twenty Euros and said gracias and walked into the hotel, pretending everything was okay. I sneaked past reception and went into my room. I opened the window, stepped onto the balcony and looked outside. I saw the street and the route I had taken. I had not been lost. I had walked exactly right. Must have been the sun.

I went inside. Waited for my boyfriend. And waited.

To be continued. Next friday. Every friday.

Link to German Translation: click Girl Friday – Buch des Bösen 05. Der Kuss

Artwork: Gabbi Werner

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